It has finally hit home – Part 3 of 3

** This story continues from Part 2. If you have not yet read Part 1 and 2 of this journey you should read both of these first before you continue with this post. You can read Part 1 at the following link: you can read Part 2 at the following link: **

So, welcome to the final post (part 3) in this major journey of my life. A little bit of a pre-warning, this might be a bit of lengthy post as it is pretty much going to cover 2 years straight in basic facts. I am not going to be going into full details in each situation as it isn’t needed in all aspects. Some aspects will need a bit of explaining and I will do that when the need arises. So, let’s get this final part started.

So, as the final part in the previous post (Part 2) I was discharged from Mona Vale District Hospital on the 9th May 2018 at around lunchtime when the ambulance transport arrived to take me from Mona Vale to Gosford. Honestly, at the time I didn’t expect it to last for more than about 2 to 3 months, which is the longest I have ever lived anywhere, apart from when I was a child or in juvenile detention.

I was dropped off at the Gosford Refuge by the transport, we went through the paperwork, I got my keys for the unit, had a small break to have a smoke and a drink before I was taken up to the unit where I would be living from that day forward. As I said previously, not expecting it to last that long due to my history. It was a major struggle for me right from the start, even to this day, which is now just over 2 years later there are times that I still struggle. But systems have been put into place to help me get through when these arrive. I have a great support network to help me when I need support or am having any problems at all.

At the start, I wouldn’t leave the unit unless it was necessary. The only time I would get out is when I had a medical appt. and when I needed to go to the chemist or do my shopping (those last 2 happened every single Friday). I was always picked up between 8 and 8.30am to get things done before crowds began hitting the supermarket and chemist, which would then set my anxiety off. Even still I always had to take medication 30 minutes before going out every week, this also continues to this day that I need time for my anxiety/panic attack medication to start kicking in before I can leave the unit.

  1. Counselling:
    I then began seeing a counsellor. I went through multiple people until I found the right one and I saw her 11 times until she began trying to force me into a kind of therapy that I did not believe in, nor did I want to go through, nor did I want weekly sessions with her. She only began demanding this new therapy and weekly appt.’s once my NDIS funding came through. This would mean higher rates and more money for her. However, I suppose she wasn’t counting on how strong I was and when I said no that is what I meant. So I left and never saw her again and told her as such. She then followed up with me on the following Saturday through email (stupid woman, by doing this gave me a paper trail that I needed). She was advised not to contact me again by any means or it would be treated as harassment and the Police would be notified as would the Board for Psychologists. The therapy she wanted to do was some kind of hypo therapy involving the flickering of my eyelids. I can’t remember the exact name it is called now. But I don’t believe in that, neither do other people I spoke to about it afterwards. And at the end of the day, it is my choice on how my treatment is done and how often I do it. It was believed by several other health professionals that weekly appt.’s for me would be too much as I needed time to process what we discussed and that can’t be done in a week. But she just wouldn’t stop, so ended up having to change my mobile number and make reports against her. When she was informed of the complaints the contact stopped.
  2. Housing:
    This was a major hurdle that we overcome. Many years ago, around 10 years to be right, I used to live in a Housing NSW property for a short time in Redfern, the unit block was 16 stories high and known as “suicide towers” as there we so many suicides of people jumping off higher-level unit balconies. And I didn’t have the support I needed or that was promised. I couldn’t go from spending over 10 years on the streets into a unit with no support and everyone expect it to work out. So for some reason, they listed me as a “never to housed” again tenant. But we got that over-turned, go onto priority housing and back-dated til when I was in hospital in 2018. I should have had a place by now but they are restricted in the type of property they can give me due to health reasons. I have to be on the ground floor and in a place with no stairs. So it is taking longer than normal, but I can stay here till that property becomes available, and to date, it has been just over 2 years. Damn, I have never lived anywhere this long in my inter 22 years being homeless.
  3. NDIS Medical / Mental Health Funding:
    Well, this was another issue we overcome in a short time. At first, after we got all the forms done and submitted they came back requesting more information. We got that and submitted it. Again they came back and said they wanted more information that we literally could no longer get ahold of from decades ago from Doctors that no longer practice, from medical centres that are no longer open, nor could I even remember half of the damn Doctors and counsellors or more professionals that I had seen over that period. It turned out that they also sent my current psychologist a 20 paper document to complete to go with her initial report. It turns out there was only ONE question on that form they needed an answer too to approved my NDIS funding. She submitted it on the Monday around lunch-time, I got a phone call on Wednesday that my application had been approved and was told a planning meeting would be arranged in about 2 weeks. That was done on Friday. I would take up to a month or a little more for my plan to be approved and get access to the funding, this occurred on the following Tuesday. And literally from the time of approval within about a week I had access to plan funds which had been approved. Such a damn miracle for them to move so fast.
  4. Health in General
    Now, talking about my general health, there has been a lot of changes in this area of my life also. My diabetes even though it isn’t fully under control still I am now taking my insulin daily as I should be as I have a fridge to keep it in now. So it is coming down, I am usually getting around the 15 mmol/L mark instead of it constantly being in the high 20s, early 30s or even HI (which is where my machine cannot get a reading, meaning it is above 35 mmol/L).
    My psoriasis has pretty much cleared up all over my body to the point in most places you can’t even notice that I ever had it before. It is amazing and has been a total life changer with my anxiety and going out into public (even though I have also issues slowing this down still).We have also found some other health problems along the way over the last 2 years, some that are soon going to require surgery and others I have to just monitor with regular blood tests and if they change will have to start having blood taken out and thrown away. It is something to do with my Iron levels that is a genetic condition from my mum. But that is all good, not like she meant to pass it on, it is just one of those things and we learn to deal with it and control it. However, the worst problem that we have found which is also the scariest and the one that requires heart surgery is a blockage in one of my left heart valves. At the moment all I know is that they need to put a stint into the vein to open it up to stop the blockage before it causes some more serious heart issues down the track. At least I will be knocked out whilst they do it. And with any luck, there won’t be any major issues during surgery so they have to fully open my chest and they can do it like through keyhole surgery. So a few little scars here and there instead of a massive line on the torso from top to bottom pretty much. They just would not be a pleasant sight for anyone.
  5. My Personal Life
    Well, there has been a couple of people I have had in my life but none of them has worked out. This isn’t something I am going to go into as I don’t want too if I am honest about it. I don’t want to dwell on these morons, some taking advantage of me in more ways than I care to explain. It is embarrassing and I can’t believe I fell for it most of the time either. But you live and learn. Now I have no thoughts of wanting anyone, not for a while anyway.
    I am talking to my mum again, which is something that I am very glad about. It is good having her back in my life, even though we only video chat, chat through Facebook and Messenger and text messages. It is the fact that we are still communicating and everything appears to be going fine this time around. I know if anything happens this time I will be done. The last time she just dropped me off the face of the earth for me doing nothing wrong at all hurt and caused me a lot of pain and heartache. But I am not going to talk about that, it is in the past and we have the future to look forward too.I wish January will hurry up though. Because mum is coming to visit for the day. Not sure what we are going to do yet, but we will figure it out. But it will be good to spend the day with her, just me and her. Also, I am hoping I will have my forever home by then and we can spend the day there. This place here is a bit too small. But we can make it work if it comes to that. For now, just have to play this one by ear and hope for the best.
  6. My New Podcast
    I have decided that I am going to produce and release a podcast series about the ups and downs of my time of living on the streets and being homeless. There are a lot of things that happened, both good and bad during those 22 years. So I am about to begin turning my story into a full-on podcast series. I have had the help of Dminor, an Australian rapper who was also homeless for many years to use his music as the Intro and Ending of my podcast series. I know what I want as the intro and I just have to cut the first song he released down to a certain period to get all the song part I want. I also have the ending, which he did for me as he reduced and cut 21-second parts out of his song Homerun and I have 3 to choose from, which I have already chosen the best for me. I just had to get his consent to use about the first 1min 10 seconds of Concrete Pillow. Which he gave with no problem.
    You can check out his 2 main songs on his website in the sidebar on the left. The first song Concrete Pillow and then followed by Homerun. You can also follow Dminor on his Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Soundcloud and Website. Thank you, Daniel, for allowing me to use your music for my podcast as it fits in perfectly with the story I am sharing.

Anyway, that is where things are up to at the moment. If you keep updated with my other blog posts you will continue finding out what is going on in my life as it happens. Keep checking back for regular updates on my life and the new journey and adventures I begin. You can follow me on Facebook and Twitter also.


About The Author

Zac is from the Central Coast of New South Wales in Australia. Zac runs his own online Web Design & Management business. In his spare time, he likes playing computer games, such as Need for Speed Most Wanted, Flight Simulator X, The Sims 4 and various others. Zac also enjoys spending time walking along the shoreline at the beach. Zac has a lot of health, both physical and mental which he is currently working on after a long history of abuse, hardship and decades being homeless. Zac continues to get by day by day and is moving forward with his life and is no longer letting anyone hold him back.